This isn’t going to be a post giving you lots of new information. Nope. The words I have written below are nothing new to you, but at the same time may be some of the most important words you will ever hear.
True Fact: 73% of moms are amazed by their child(ren) every day and 66% say being a mom makes them extremely happy.
Even with this amazing statistic, we get busy. Life takes us away from being present, loving, listening, compassionate, empathetic, tender with our kids. We get up in the morning and its go time! And for many moms, it stays that way until the evening when most of us hit our internal off switch and collapse on the sofa to decompress in front of TV.
But this is the thing. We get one shot ladies. One shot to do this right. Our kids need us to be tapped in, loving and present and it isn’t as hard as you think it is. This post is meant to help you wake up to a few key moments you have during the day and inspire you to show up in these moments with presence and love. Because we are not talking about walking around 24/7 as perfect mom! We are talking about tapping into a few moments a day – 5 at least – in order to maintain connection with our children. It is important to them and this simple act of being conscious can leave us feeling recharged and proud of who we are as mothers.
1st Mommy Moment
Rise and shine! For many of us morning times suck. I am up at 6am and it is basically go-time from the moment my feet hit the floor. If I am not conscious about welcoming my children into this new day with a smile, a hug and maybe even a little tickle, it is like neither of us get off on the right foot. Taking time to rise from a good night’s sleep with an open heart is a gift you give to your children that they benefit from all day. (Note: A good night’s sleep can be required for this moment!)
2nd Mommy Moment
Think of Love. I love to remind myself to do this at least once throughout the day. I can get busy with work and my writing, but stopping to tap into love for my two little muffins during the day, I know is good for me and for them. Why? Because it reminds me of the good stuff and helps me welcome in the afternoon with optimism and love. When we think about what we love about a person, it influences our actions when we are around them and helps us deal better with the chaos or consternation that may pop up throughout the day. And how do I know that sending them little energetic messages of love while they are at school doesn’t somehow infect their hearts too?
3rd Mommy Moment
After school blues. Kids work hard. My daughter, who is only 9 years old, has 7 hour school days. That is a lot of time to be on for a kid. When she comes home, she needs space to emotionally and mentally decompress. This moment is about being where your child is and giving them space to be. Try to get conscious about what is going on in your child’s life right now and what they may need from you. Understanding, space and presence are all skills that float to the surface naturally when we take the focus off of ourselves and onto our children.
4th Mommy Moment
Dinner-time connection. With the busyiness of life, often our meal times are eaten on the fly. I suggest that you make this time a special time, a time for connection. You can begin with expressing gratitude for the meal in front of you, or being asking your kids what one great or fun thing happened today. Making this time a time to express curiosity, optimism and appreciation can help your children feel seen, respected and loved.
5th Mommy Moment
Sleepy-time closeness. Bedtime can also be a time parents tend to rush through but for many of us can also be a time of great closeness. The business of the day dies down, the little bodies get to stretch out and relax in their cozy beds. I suggest that you make time for connection at bed time. Schedule that time in. Finish up dinner, dishes and TV a little bit early and create a bedtime routine that honors connecting with your child. And your challenge for this one is to be fully present. Not singing a song or reading a book thinking about something else or itching to get away to send an email, but fully, 100% present with your child. This fills your child up with safety, love and tenderness and sends them into a sweet and restful sleep.
What we do matters as mothers. But how we show up, our energy, our focus, I believe matters more. Here are 5 moments you can tap into throughout the day to remind your children that they are loved and remind yourself that you are indeed one fantastic mommy.